


a honey voice and sad eyes

by blackbluewoo



Category: A.C.E (Beat Interactive Band)
Genre: Idk what to tag this with, M/M, Teen AU, i'm a whore for dongjun sorry i'll write more ships later, kinda sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 17:15:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15369420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackbluewoo/pseuds/blackbluewoo
Summary: Beneath them, Jun can see the ocean, shimmering blue against the sandy yellow shore. The tide comes in and out without fail, unchanging still in the light of day.





	a honey voice and sad eyes

The air is thick and humid, the smell of sea salt clear and fresh as Jun tiptoes away from his cabin on to the beach. The sky is indigo- remnants of red and orange sun dancing on the horizon, but not enough to provide light. The tide came in as the moon shone bright and full above Jun’s head. A white streak of light illuminates the sand beneath Jun’s feet, and he feels it only appropriate to remove his shoes and roll up the cuffs of his pyjama trousers.

 

The sand weaves itself between Junhee’s toes and he laughs quietly to himself. He’s 16, young and stupid and trapped in his highschool with three friends that he would drop if given the chance. He usually hated holidays with his parents, but standing here under the light of the moon, the faint breeze brushing through his clothes and sand under his feet… he feels so free.

 

Jun takes a few steps forward, daring to enter the ocean. The water was surprisingly warm for 12am. It swirls around his ankles comfortably and reflects the light of the moon. He spreads his arms, like he’s flying, and tilts his head back, breathing in the thick air like swallowing water.

 

“Enjoying yourself?” A voice made itself known.

 

Embarrassed, Jun immediately lowers his arms and turns around.

 

There, sat on the sand only a few metres away from him was another boy. He looked around the same age as Jun himself. He wore normal clothes, a t-shirt and shorts, and suddenly Jun felt stupid in his rolled up pyjamas. The boy smiles at him, leaning back slightly with his palms in the sand behind him. He shakes his head to allow his hair to fall out of his face, and then tilts it curiously at Jun.

 

“Why are you staring?”

 

“Ah, sorry,” Jun says, realising abashedly that he had been looking at the boy for a long time and diverting his eyes to the water he was standing in. “I was just surprised.”

 

“Why? You’re out here too.”

 

Jun stays silent, eyes focused intently on the water pooled around his ankles. A minute ago he felt like he could talk to the moon and it would listen, and now he felt indescribably small, like the whole world had decided to go on and grow without him. He knew the boy was looking at him, but he didn’t know what to say or do to make him leave or to make him stop looking.

 

“Why are you out here?” Jun finally asks, raising his eyes to meet the boy’s.

 

“Am I not allowed?” He answers cockily, smiling widely again. Jun notices he has braces.

 

“Most people don’t come to the beach at 12am,” Jun mumbles, shuffling his feet again.

 

“I guess we’re not most people,” The other boy replies.

 

A few seconds of silence passed, both of the boys looking intently at each other.

 

“Sit over here. Your feet are gonna get wrinkly.” The boy comments suddenly, patting the sand beside him.

 

Jun makes his way over, and sits gingerly next to the boy, his knees pulled up to his chest and arms wrapped around himself, as if protecting himself from the cool breeze. Next to him, the boy sits leaning back, legs crossed over at the ankles. He seems relatively calm, staring straight ahead at the ocean in front of him. Jun watches his chest rise and fall, watches the boy exhale gently every few seconds through his slightly parted lips.

 

“I’m here on holiday,” Jun whispers, leaning his chin on his legs. “This is my first night.”

 

“How long are you staying for?” The boy inquires.

 

“Three more nights, after this one.”

 

The boy nods in acknowledgement, still looking out at the ocean- the waves washing in and out slowly, rhythmically. Jun notices him tapping his fingers against the sand and his lips moving in time. Ah. That was why his mouth was open.

 

“You sing,” Jun comments.

 

The boy stops mouthing, but carries on tapping as his features spread into an easy smile. He turned to face Jun.

 

“And you do too,” The boy says questioningly. Jun nods.

 

“I want to become an idol, in a boy group or something.”

 

“You’re a trainee?”

 

“No. My parents wont let me go to Seoul until I’m 18. But I take dance and vocal classes. Are you gonna become an idol as well?”

 

The boy turns away from Jun, uncrossing his legs and sitting up straighter.

 

“Just a singer. I’ve wanted to be a singer for as long as I can remember. My mom… she has a really beautiful voice. She sung around me a lot as a kid, when I was sad or couldn’t sleep. I want to do that to people- make them calm. To more people than she did.”

 

Jun turns to face the boy beside him again. He’s attractive enough to become an idol- skin practically flawless, eyes big and bright, lips perfect and pink, his tongue darting out from in between to lick them-

 

“Why do you wanna become an idol?” He asks.

 

Jun laughs, and scratches the nape of his neck awkwardly. _It would sound so stupid,_ especially in contrast to what the boy had said before him. He didn’t have something deep or meaningful to justify his dreams- they were just dreams.

 

“It just- makes me happy. Singing and dancing.” Jun says self-consciously, turning his head away from the boy next to him in case he laughs.

 

He does, gently, and it sounds happy more than mocking.

 

“Cute,” He remarks.

 

“I’m 16, I’m not cute,” Jun pouts.

 

“I’m 17, so I can call you cute if I want to.” The other boy asserts, his tone playful.

 

Silence falls between them this time, but more comfortable. They watch the tide go in and out again repeatedly, an unfaltering pattern. The other boy sings gently under his breath, his voice carried by the wind that cards through their hair and wanders under their shirts. Jun compliments him on his voice, but the other boy just laughs.

 

They talk again, about their favourite songs and artists and dances. The other boy paints a picture with his voice and his hands- speaking fast but soft, a slight accent on his tongue. Jun noticed that even when the boy was just speaking, his voice was soft and mellifluous, like honey. His voice was fairly low but not so much so it didn’t suit his face- it was gentle and warm and somewhat husky but not too much so. It was pretty, and that was the only thing that didn’t match- because the other boy was more handsome than he was pretty- visible jawline and broad shoulders and muscular arms. Thinking about it made Jun blush.

 

The boy is easy to be around. He leans back slightly and listens to Jun talk, talk about anything and everything that’s bothering him. They talk about holidays and their parents and school, Jun complaining about all his “friends” and letting the boy laugh at him. The older talks about his singing and variety shows and Jun talks about dancing and EDM and he finds himself having too much fun with someone he’s barely known for an hour and a half.

 

It’s like they fit together.

 

Jun checks his watch absently. 2am. His eyes widen.

 

He has to go on a bus tour with his parents at 10am the next morning, and he doesn’t function well when he’s tired. As much as he doesn’t want to, he has to leave.

 

“I’m sorry, I have to go,” Jun apologises, standing up suddenly.

 

“It’s cool,” The boy said as he leaned back to lay completely in the sand, one arm thrown over his eyes. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

\--

 

Jun arrives earlier the next day, this time in a t-shirt, sweatshirt and shorts. He hadn’t planned to go out yesterday, but now that it seemed to be a _thing,_ he makes sure he’s dressed well enough. Tonight it’s colder, the wind stronger and water freezing enough to put Jun off the idea of standing in it. The night also seems darker, and Jun pulls his sweatshirt tighter around his shoulders.

 

His friends messaged him yesterday, saying they missed him and asking when he got back so they could go watch Inception _because everyone’s talking about it_. His ex girlfriend also messaged him yesterday, but he ignored it. He didn’t really feel like talking to anyone yesterday, especially his parents, his mind was too occupied by the dark-haired boy with the honey voice who sat next to him on the beach yesterday.

 

The longer Jun waits, the more convinced he is that he had just imagined this boy. He hadn’t even got his name, he realises. It makes him feel kind of bitter- the only person he actually wanted to talk might not even _exist_.

  


“Hi,” A familiar voice comes from beside him.

 

Tonight, the boy is wearing a dress shirt tucked into slacks. He’s wearing flip flops though, a stark contrast against the rest of his outfit. Jun also notices he’s tanned, and although he can’t decipher his exact skin tone, he can tell the bronze of the older boy’s skin goes well against the crisp white of his shirt.

 

“Hi,” Jun replies, holding back a smile. “You’re dressed up.”

 

“I went out for dinner,” He comments, letting his lips fall into a comfortable smile.

 

There’s a hitch in his breath, like he just ran here. It makes Jun feel strangely flattered.

 

“I never got your name,” Jun says suddenly, looking straight at the older boy. He’s still smiling.

 

“Donghun. Lee Donghun. And you?”

 

“Park Junhee. Everyone just calls me Jun.”

 

Donghun nods in acknowledgement before turning his head back to face the ocean again. Jun notices the way the dress shirt falls against Donghun’s stomach, unbuttoned at the top to expose his chest, and outlining very obvious muscles on his stomach. Even on his legs, the material of his trousers cling to his thighs like it was specifically tailored for him. He wonders if Donghun is rich enough to have that done specifically. Jun also notes a long earring dangling from the older boy’s ear, a chain finished with a moon charm. It’s strangely fitting.

 

“My ex-girlfriend texted me yesterday,” Jun says, not knowing exactly why he’s saying it but he still does. “She said she misses me and that she wants to talk. But she cheated on me. So I’m ignoring her.”

 

It almost feels like Jun’s talking to no-one, maybe that’s why it’s so comfortable to just say things to Donghun he wouldn’t normally say to anyone else.

 

“My ex texted me a couple nights ago,” Donghun adds on. “I ignored him too.”

 

Jun is about to ask a question when he suddenly loses his train of thought. He. _He._ Ex- _boy_ friend.

 

“He,” Jun whispers to himself, his mouth suddenly feeling very dry.

 

“Is it a problem?” Donghun asks nonchalantly.

 

“No, it’s just-” Jun chuckles abashedly. “I’ve never met a gay person before.”

 

“I’m your first,” Donghun laughs, looking back out over the water.

 

“There’s no gay people in my school,” Jun says, words nearly dying in his throat.

 

He should say it out loud. It’ll be the first time, and Donghun won’t ask any questions. All he can hear is his own heartbeat- the washing of the waves seems miles away.

 

“Apart from me,” He adds, looking down sharply to avoid eye contact.

 

“I’m sure you're not the only one,” Donghun reassures. “There must be some other people who haven’t come out yet.”

 

Jun shrugs, but he feels like there’s a weight off his shoulders. Him saying it out loud, to someone. It didn’t feel revolutionary, but some weird part of Jun was screaming inside. He let his lips curl into a smile.

 

“Was that your first time coming out?” Donghun asks, a smirk evident on his face.

 

Jun’s smile drops.

 

“How-?”

 

“You can just tell. You looked nervous. I don’t bite, I promise.” Donghun chuckles, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.

 

“My highschool’s pretty straight as well. We had a trans guy, but no-one took him seriously. He was a senior when I was a freshman. He cut his skirt and sewed it into shorts. He got really badly scolded, but then when he got put on T he was allowed to wear trousers. He was my first hero.” Donghun reminisces, his voice smooth and gentle.

 

“Gay guy at my school got stones thrown at him,” Jun recounts. “I was kinda afraid of coming out after that.”

 

It feels weird to be talking so candidly with a complete stranger about his sexuality. He’s been quiet about it for years, and the words all feel foreign on his tongue, and he’s practically shivering in the sand (and not from the cold). But it feels so new, and so good, and so perfect just to hear Donghun speak about himself and his sexuality and his ex-boyfriend.

 

So, they talk. Again. It seems like Jun’s brain can’t stop whirring around Donghun- he talks about his school and his parents and his family back in Suncheon until he’s breathless and tired and stumbling over words. He feels shaky, adrenaline coursing through his veins. He hasn’t done anything, and that makes it more pathetic in Jun’s eyes, how excited he can get from just talking to Donghun about being gay. The thing that Jun hasn’t talked to anyone about ever.

 

“Are you… out?” Jun probes.

 

“To my friends… yeah. Not to my family. I never would admit it but they’d never treat me the same if they found out,” Donghun laughs bitterly, looking away. “They say they love you but they don’t actually. Only the idea. Not the person.”

 

Donghun is only a year older than Jun, but acts so much more mature.  Jun feels like crying and shrinking as small as he can get, but he also feels like screaming. He says this.

 

“Scream. No one from the cabins will be able to hear you.” Donghun offers.

 

“No, I’m not doing that,” Jun laughs.

 

“Ah, you’re no fun. Watch.”

 

Donghun leans back a little and clears his throat.

 

“I’m bisexual!” He screams.

 

In the distance, Jun hears bird’s wings flapping and the echo of Donghun’s scream. However, after a few seconds, everything is quiet and still again. The only noise is the swash of water on to the sand near their feet.

 

Jun copies Donghun exactly, and he feels so… alive, when Donghun looks at him with a glimmer in his eye and a smirk playing across his lips. He feels so free when he screams again into nothing, his voice cracking halfway but Donghun accentuating it with several loud whoops. They hear the fluttering of wings again, and Jun feels manic with happiness.

 

“I feel like telling the world,” Jun laughs, out of breath.

 

Donghun smiles softly, looking down at his lap. His hair falls in front of his face again, and Jun unconsciously reaches forward to brush it out of his eyes.

 

He realises what he’s doing halfway, hand awkwardly paused, halfway behind Donghun’s ear. The older boy is looking at him, eyes wide but soft, looking directly into his own. Jun doesn’t know what he’s doing, and takes away his hand like he’s been burned, trying not to think about how Donghun was inches away from him, how his lips were parted ever so slightly as if he was going to say something. They both look in opposite directions.

 

It was embarrassing. All because Donghun was gay didn’t mean he felt anything for Jun.

 

Donghun brushes the hair out of his own eyes, and leans falls back into the sand. Jun watches, a faint smile on his face but a coil of anxiety still present in his stomach.

 

After a few moments, the older boy grabs Jun’s wrist and pulls him backwards. He lands with a thump, sand spraying up around him. Donghun just laughs and shuffles closer, so their shoulders are touching.

 

“Hey, what are you doing?” Jun complains.

 

Donghun takes Jun’s hand in his own, and points up with his other finger at the sky.

 

“Constellations. The sky’s clear tonight. You can see everything.”

 

And it was true. Dotted across the stretch of black were thousands of tiny pricks of light. He could hear Donghun explaining the different constellations and pointing them out, but he couldn’t register it. His mind was too occupied with Donghun’s warm, big hand and Donghun’s shoulder and Donghun’s voice to even start processing the information. He just nodded and went “ah,” every minute or two to act like he understood.

 

After Donghun stops explaining, they lay in silence. He lets go of Jun’s hand and rolls over onto his side, placing the palm of his other hand on the younger’s chest. Jun is suddenly afraid that Donghun will feel his heart racing. He can’t even look at the other boy because their faces are ridiculously close and Jun doesn’t want to embarass himself.

 

“Where do you live, Park Junhee?” Donghun says gently, his breath fanning over Jun’s cheek. It smells like peppermint, and the younger is suddenly conscious of his own breath.

 

“Suncheon,” He answers, breathing shallow as to not disturb Donghun.

 

“Oh,” Donghun replies, disappointed.

 

“Why, where do you live?”

 

“Gyeonggi-do.”

 

The whole other side of the country.

 

Something feels weird and tight in Jun’s chest, and he doesn’t know what it is.

 

He’ll think about everything else later. He’ll think about what Donghun means to him after two nights, later. He’ll think about why he’s told Donghun more than his family and friends combined, later. He’ll think about why something twists in his stomach when Donghun readjusts himself, letting his hand drop down from Jun’s chest to his waist, later. He’ll think about everything later. Not now. He won’t think now. Now, he just wants to enjoy the warmth of Donghun’s hand and the stars above his head.  

 

He tries not to notice how Donghun’s staring at him.

 

\--

 

Jun is impatient. Throughout dinner all he can think about is Donghun and his peppermint breath and his warm hands. He keeps looking at the clock and bouncing his leg and he doesn’t notice until his mother places a hand on his thigh and asks if he’s okay.

 

He doesn’t know whether he’s nervous or excited, but he just plays it off with a smile.

 

Dinner drags on longer than expected. It’s 11:00 when Jun comes back, and he has to make sure his parents are asleep before he leaves for the beach. He decides to just wear what he has on now, like Donghun did yesterday. Should he unbutton the top? He does, and looks at himself in the mirror and feels almost embarrassed. The only reason it worked for Donghun was because he had something to show off. Jun is scrawny, and small, and when he unbuttons his shirt he looks like a twig.

 

When he arrives at the beach, Donghun’s already there. He’s standing this time, hands in the pockets of an outfit similar to what he wore yesterday. Jun approaches, and places a hand on Donghun’s shoulder. The older boy smiles at him, and looks him up and down before turning back to look over the ocean.

 

“Tonight and tomorrow,” Jun comments. “Then I’m going back to Suncheon.”

 

“Tomorrow,” Donghun says absently, his eyes scanning sand in front of him. He kicks it lightly, sand raining everywhere.

 

“Hey,” Jun moans. “You’re gonna get sand in my shoes.”

 

“Take them off,” Donghun offers, looking at Jun with a glint in his eye. “We’ll run into the ocean.”

 

There’s a pause.

 

“Are you joking.” Jun says flatly.

 

“Or you can go in with your shoes on,” Donghun says, taking off his shoes and his socks, rolling up his trousers as far as they can go. “Come on. It’ll be fun.”

 

Jun takes off his shoes and socks, complaining the entire time, while the other boy is practically bouncing waiting for him. As soon as Jun has rolled up his trousers, up to just below his knees, Donghun takes his hand and guides him slowly towards the water.

 

He dips a toe in and resists the urge to scream. It’s not particularly cold, not pneumonia level, and besides, the air is still warm and thick, but it’s cold enough to make him yelp. Donghun pulls a face as well, but manages to drag Jun in until they’re calf-level deep. Jun isn’t cold, not at all, but he’s shivering because he’s wearing full clothes and Donghun is laughing and holding his hand and he feels adrenaline coursing throughout his body to the point where he’s shaking. Donghun just pulls him in further, turned backwards to hold both his hands and look at him straight, and they submerge their trousers as well, the rolling gone to waste as it gets wet anyways.

 

Jun’s teeth are chattering. He’s not cold, or afraid, but this is a new experience and it feels like it’s eating him alive.

 

“Hey,” Donghun says softly, pulling Jun closer to him. “I’m here, right? You’re gonna be fine. Do you wanna go back?”

 

Jun shakes his head, and a lock of his hair falls in front of his eyes. Donghun reaches forwards and brushes it behind his ear, hand sliding down to cup his jaw.

 

“We can go back if you want,” Donghun reassures, his voice gentle and deep, mouth inches away from Jun’s.

 

Jun uses the moment to glide his hand through the water in Donghun’s direction, splashing him completely. Donghun splutters and takes a few steps back, smirk finding its way across his lips again.

 

“Park Junhee, you will pay for this,” He shouts, digging both his hands into the water and throwing it in Jun’s direction.

 

Donghun chases Jun, splashing water consistently in his direction until he’s completely soaked through. Jun retaliates by throwing handfuls of water at the older boy, but he only ends up getting made fun of for his small hands. He throws harder and Donghun just carries on walking through it, unbothered since he’s already wet, a smile dancing across his lips.

 

As he nears Jun he grabs his hand to stop him from throwing water, and links his own fingers between them. Jun’s breath catches in his throat as he laughs, because Donghun is less than an inch away from him. He’s blinking slowly, lips stretched into a smirk, water streaming down his face. His bangs are in his eyes, and Jun reaches up with his free hand on purpose instinct to brush them out of the older boy’s face, letting his hand drag across the Donghun’s face and eventually rest on his shoulder.

 

Donghun moves forward and closes the gap between them in a chaste kiss. His lips are soft and delicate, and Jun feels the blood rise to his face as Donghun opens his mouth slightly, squeezing their hands tighter together, the older boy’s free hand coming to settle on Jun’s waist. Jun feels like he can’t breathe, as if when he does the moment between them will shatter, because Donghun’s applying no pressure at all, the hand on his waist barely touching. Jun lets his hand drop from Donghun’s shoulder down his chest and torso, grabbing onto his wet t-shirt and pulling them closer together.

 

His mind is rational- is telling him to pull away before someone sees, before he’s in too deep, before he’s head over heels for this boy who lives practically the entire country away from him. His heart tells him to pull Donghun closer- and that’s the voice he listens to, pressing themselves together, hands unlinked and touching the older boy’s face, fingers smoothing across his jawline and down his neck. Donghun kisses gently, like there’s something in between them that could break. Jun’s insistent, but Donghun’s chasteness slows him down.

 

They pull apart and Donghun rests his forehead against Jun’s.

 

“How do you mean so much to me when I’ve only known you for three days?” Jun whispers, hands still resting on Donghun’s face.

 

“I don’t know,” Donghun replies. “You know a lot about me I’ve never told anyone else.”

 

They pull apart completely, Donghun leading Jun out the water, their hands linked.

 

As they arrive onto the sand, Jun is pulled into another kiss, more desperate this time. Donghun pulls away, and stares at Jun for a while, breathless. It makes Jun feel exposed, like someone’s peeled away all his layers and is looking at him naked. It’s like Donghun is trying to remember each detail of Jun’s face, like if he looks away for even a second he’ll forget.

 

“Hey,” Jun chuckles softly, looking away, playing with his fingers. “Stop staring at me.”

 

“You’re so…” Donghun begins, but trails off. He tilts his head again, curiously, like he’s seeing Jun clearly for the first time.

 

The way Donghun looks at him makes him want to cry. His eyes look like they have tears in them, and the older boy lifts his hands and cups Jun’s face so delicately, like he’s made of glass. Donghun looks like he’s found something in Jun, his eyes mirroring the light of the stars in the sky above them. Jun has to blink back tears.

 

“I should go,” He says, a lump in his throat, pulling away from Donghun’s touch.

 

“Please stay,” Donghun whispers as Jun puts on his socks and shoes.

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

Jun stands up again and kisses Donghun. The older boy clings onto him as if he’s about to lose him. When they pull away, Donghun stares at Jun again. Only briefly, because in a matter of seconds Jun is gone like he’d never been there at all.

 

\--

 

Jun dreams about Donghun that night. A replay of events, like Donghun grabs him in the middle of the ocean again, and waits. He dreams of Donghun’s intruding eyes-  somber, like they could read Jun inside out. Everytime Donghun tilts his head at Jun and begins his sentence, the dream ends suddenly.

 

“You’re so…”

 

He never finds out what Donghun was going to say.

 

\--

 

The day passes by quickly in the little town, he wakes up late and buys trinkets for his friends back home. He eats lunch with his dad, and spends the afternoon on the beach. They eat quickly in the evening, and spend some time together. Together, but Jun isn’t _there_. Everything he sees reminds him Donghun- the older boy running through his mind all day.

 

He goes to the beach that night, his number scrawled on his palm and a pen in his pocket. Donghun isn’t there when he arrives, but that’s okay. He’ll wait.

 

So he does. He waits.

 

The ocean washes in and out, again and again, unchanging, and Donghun is nowhere to be seen. Jun waits faithfully. He nearly drifts off at one point, but he simply rests his head on his knees, and he knows he has to stay awake. He hopes knows that Donghun is going to show up eventually. The older boy wouldn’t just abandon him. They kissed. Donghun held Jun’s face in his hand and kissed him again and again and told him to stay, but he left.

 

It’s when the sun comes up, peeking above the horizon that Jun’s hope begins to fade. He ducks his head behind his folded arms, feeling the warmth of the sun as it slowly rises. Colours spill out into the sky- bright, unnatural, staining the black of the night and hiding the stars that once looked down on him and Donghun.

 

Jun goes to the front desk, asks about a Lee Donghun. The woman insists she’s not supposed to say customer information, but Jun pouts a little, flashes a smile, taps the desk and brushes his hair back with one hand, does all the charming things he knows people fall for, and the lady gives in. With a sigh, she clicks onto her customer register. Jun thanks her profusely, his heart racing in his chest

 

“Lee Donghun, in a suite with his family. They checked out this morning.”

 

Jun can’t register those words. He hears them, and plasters a smile on his face before thanking the lady again, but he can’t process it. Donghun is _gone_. Jun didn’t get his number, even his goddamn city, and now he’s just gone.

 

His parents scold him when he arrives, but he makes up an excuse about how he went out early for breakfast. He knows they can tell he’s lying, but they decide not to care in favour for cramming their bags full of clothes and souvenirs. All that’s on Jun’s mind is Donghun, Donghun’s laugh and smile and eyes and lips and hair, and Jun doesn’t know what to do because now he’s gone. He’s gone and Jun doesn’t know if they’ll ever find each other again or talk again or do anything again.

 

He touches his lips lightly, remembering the feeling of Donghun pressed against them, hands on his face, water dripping down his back and sand in between his toes. He remembers Donghun’s broken _“Please stay,”_ as the last thing he said.

 

Jun gets in the car, and plugs his headphones in. He doesn’t know where his mind is.

 

He searches up Lee Donghun on instagram, on twitter, on facebook. All that comes up are a couple dozen profiles lacking display pictures or biographies detailed enough to let Jun know that it’s him. Donghun. The boy with the cute brace-d smile and the sad eyes and the pretty voice.

 

Donghun. The boy who kissed him in the middle of the ocean with their hands on each other under the stars who whispered _“Please stay,”_ like a prayer before he disappeared without a trace. The boy whose eyes shone and voice flowed like honey.

 

Jun was angry, above everything. Why didn’t Donghun give Jun his number, or his myspace, or his facebook? All he had was his name, and that was useless.

 

Their car pulls out of the resort, and passes a long a rocky cliff road. Beneath them, Jun can see the ocean, shimmering blue against the sandy yellow shore. The tide comes in and out without fail, unchanging still in the light of day.

 

\--

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i was thinking of writing an epilogue- if i do it'll be attached as a second chapter to this work  
> also ik i shouldve used the term sea and not ocean but jun wanted to call himself ocean and i thought it was all so fitting and cute and i couldn't resist...  
> leave kudos if u enjoyed reading!! don't be afraid to leave a comment bc i love replying to them :D


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